"Is the car not working?"

I almost died and my only thought was "That semi-truck is going to hit us."
Time slowed down, I accepted the fact that I was going to die.
And I felt nothing.

I never knew how unafraid of death I really was.

I didn't cry until I thought of you.
How you would react. If you would cry at the airport, waiting for the first flight home. What dress you would wear to my funeral and where would you tell the kids that I went. Christmas would make you sad and New Years would just be the year I never made it to. I thought about you wishing you hadn't stopped talking to me. Who would blame who. Would you pretend to love me even if I was horrible in your eyes. Would you make up stories about us. How many tears would you waste on me when I wasn't even worth crying over. Even if we didn't particularly care for each other you don't deserve that.

I wasn't scared of dying because dying isn't the scary part. Being left behind is.